We Are Walking in Honor of Briella. Please Help Us Meet Our Goal.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

23 weeks 4 days

Yesterday was a no good rotten terrible day. The contractions that started Sunday night grew more intense through the night. By Monday morning when my dr had came to check on me, I was in pain, had already had 2 bad bleeds ( tennis ball clots). She checked & said I had started to dilate. A friend had sent me an email saying that her nurses had told her before birth that they would do what they could but if they were told there wasn't anything that could be done they need to just enjoy the minutes they had. So I asked my dr if they would let me know like that. She said that the only thing they would do is "comfort care." Put a hat on her and give her to us. I felt at the very least I wanted her to try oxygen to see if she was a fighter & could have a chance. Dr said if I was wanting to try anything I needed to be transferred immediately. That's when it started getting hectic. I was told I needed a transfusion so one arm was being prepped for an iv while the other arm had started the magnesium to stop contractions. Then my dr said my new dr wanted me to have the steroid shots to mature babies lungs. I had asked twice about it & was told no earlier than 23 days 6 weeks. So was happy to get it. Then they said st Luke's on the plaza was full. Then said center point was full. So was transferred by ambulance to op regional. The magnesium started making me agitated. I was mad the nurse refused to hold my hand during the steroid shot. I was mad the ambulance ride was so bumpy. I was mad I had to give blood again as soon as I got here even though I had just given it 25 min earlier at a different hospital. I just went to a bad place. I wouldn't let Brian back in the room. My parents came & I just wanted to be alone. By the time I let Brian back in I was so weak. I could barely open my eyes. I couldn't talk, just whisper. I just had given up. I felt like I was laying there waiting to die. Brian fed me a string cheese & it literally took about 30 minutes for 1 piece of cheese. I didn't sleep. I was so scared of moving an inch. I hated the catheter. Every 2 hours someone comes in to listen to my lungs, heart & check my reflexes.

Today my contractions had stopped. They took my catheter out & lowered my dose of mag. I ate lunch. I walked to the bathroom. I felt human again.
While I still have a constant iv & get blood drawn every 8hrs & rest only in 2 hr spurts, I am in a better place. That magnesium was evil. It made me so hot & pretty much depressed. I allowed mom & Aub to come see me after she got out of school. My contractions came back but were very slow apart. I had a good dinner & a good visit with Brian's mom & am feeling at peace. Tomorrow if my contractions stay away I will be taken off the mag. So I feel hopeful that I can make it another week. I am weary however since I know for every good day there are 2 bad days, but still hopeful. Right now we are still on an hr by hr basis & their goal was to keep me pregnant overnight. Friday will be 24 weeks.
We are at a level 3 NICU now so they are prepared to do everything for her.

I see every single comment & message & feel the prayers. Please keep them coming. I wish I had the energy to respond to them all but I love to read them.

10 comments:

  1. Stacey-I think about you everyday! You are so strong my friend!! Your a fighter~ Hugs!Jamie

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  2. Saw your post a few days ago on WTE Jan board & just wanted to say that you're in my thoughts. I can't even imagine what you're going through but you sound like one strong Momma & I'm so glad to hear that you got the steroid shots & were transferred. Hang in there & know lots of people are sending you best wishes :)
    Lori (Elle-Girls in Manitoba, Canada)

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  3. Stacey- I'm praying for you every day. The song Promises by Sanctus Real always comes to mind when I read your posts. I hope the lyrics can give you some peace.
    Beth Markworth

    Sometimes it's hard to keep believing
    In what you can't see
    That everything happens for a reason
    Even the worst life brings
    If you're reaching for an answer
    And you don't know what to pray
    Just open up the pages
    Let His word be your strength

    And hold on to the promises (Hold tight)
    Hold on to the promises (Alright)
    Jesus is alive so hold tight
    Hold on to the promises

    All things work for the good
    Of those who love God
    He holds back nothing that will heal you
    Not even His own Son
    His love is everlasting
    His faithfulness unending
    Oh, if God is for us who can be against us
    So if you feel weak

    Neither life, nor death
    Could separate us
    From the eternal love
    Of our God who saves us

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  4. Hang in there Stacy you are doing soooo well!! Your now in the best place to give the best care to you and baby girl!!! Keep you're head up momma you guys are going to co rout of this stronger then you were before!!!!

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  5. I pray for you and your family often throughout the day. I am checking your blog and the boards frequently for updates. Keep it up Mamma! You're doing great! I've been reading how tough this has been on you and I cant really know the full extent, but I feel for you wholeheartedly. I'm sending lots of christian love your way and prayers for you. Keep up the good work!
    r. Bracke
    rosie1981 from wte

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  6. So many prayers for you and your baby!!!

    Jpowers821 from wte

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  7. stacy,
    i don't know you, but i'm praying for you. i heard about your story through the What to Expect group on facebook and i want you to know that many women are concerned for you, thinking of you, and praying for you.

    God has a plan for you and for this baby. you are loved.

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  8. Stacy,
    I don't really know anything about you but what you have written in your blog above. But, I want you to know I am thinking of you. Friday is just around the corner....you, and baby girl King WILL make it. I am the most determined person you would ever meet...and I am TELLING you, I AM DETERMINED FOR YOU....YOU AND BABY GIRL WILL MAKE IT!!
    All my love,
    Lynn

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  9. You strong, beautiful pair of ladies! Hang in there! I am praying so hard for you both. Much love and keep us posted.

    -via WTE

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